Thursday, April 2, 2009

Ed's Announcement

Ed was packing up his office this morning. I asked if he was getting pink slipped and he said he wasn't. He then told me to go and get Bill.

Bill and I came to the office expecting to receive the pink slips ourselves, (get laid off) but to our surprise, he had a different story for us.

"Listen up boys. They have stopped giving out pink slips. I attended an emergency meeting this morning, and well, the whole company is closing. We are insolvent and our assets are being absorbed and transferred to another company that has received federal funds. That company is located in New York. As you know, that is not where we reside. The entire staff of the company is being sacked and the company, as we know it, no longer exists.

Let me tell you, we are up shit's creek gentlemen. No one else knows. We're not supposed to let staff know until tomorrow.

They must be stupid to think that I'm going to keep it from you guys. Anyway, keep it under wraps for now guys and get a move on cleaning out your valuables. This is the end of the road for us. I expect you guys to behave as if nothing has happened until they announce the closure to the rest of the staff. That means come to work and do your jobs. Don't worry, your still getting paid until the formal announcement by the executives. I expect that to come tomorrow morning."

I have a headache.

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